Monday, May 10, 2010

Note to self...

There are few things worse than being trapped in a spiral of self-defeating habits that gnaw you into compliance. Starting out small, they wormed their way into my daily life, slowly, unassumingly until they became a master and I, a slave. Substance abuse, over eating, cussing, laziness, depression, etc. are all activities I was not born with, but habits that have lead myself to this day.

"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." ~M. SCOTT PECK~

In my last four years of discomfort in who I was, what I was becoming, I started the hard task of change. In my continued journey of change, weight loss, husbandry, and parenthood I have come to the realization of certain behaviors, combinations of habits that I created, sustained, and knelt in servitude before are all my fault 100%.

First realization, nutrition is important. I always said to myself, it didn't matter what I ate. Hamburgers, fries, pizza, burrito's, pop, etc. are all just food, my body need food, right? Besides I workout, I'll just burn it off, ya know, tomorrow. When I took an honest look at what I eat, it was painfully obvious I was not getting the proper nutrition my body needs to be at it's optimal weight and health. When don't have the proper nutrition you're tired, and when you're tired you're cranky, and you might not even be aware of it but you are negatively effecting those around you. Your sleep is a direct reflection to your nutrition, you eat crap, you can't sleep worth a crap. There are so many things that seem to take care of themselves when you're putting in your mouth what your body needs, and not what your cravings need.

Second, exercise is important. When I was in the Army, fitness was something I worked at because I had to. It was drilled into me at basic, and my fitness was important for promotions, which is a strong motivator. When I ETS'd from the Army, I also ETS'd from my workout. This was a terrible mistake, but one I made nonetheless. I know now I quit because it was attached to a job. I worked out for the Army's sake, not for me. The hardest is making the time, consistently, to dedicate to exercise. I justified my laziness by telling myself it is a selfish activity that takes time away from my wife, my family, my friends and the activities we wanted to do after work.

Letting yourself go is selfish, to take on the habits of overeating, inactivity and laziness lead to depression and self loathing. What good am I as a husband, a father if I allow myself to develop clogged arteries, joint pain, type 2 diabetes, pulmonary dysfunction, etc, etc. how am I providing when my life span is reduced? You, me, owe it to those we love the most to get off our butt and fix the things that aren't genetic, don't die before you see your kids grow up just because you like beer and brauts, don't let your children inter their adult lives without your guidance and companionship because of a craving for jelly donuts and cheesburgers.

Third, change is important. I did not get to today all at once. I didn't get fat overnight, I didn't become depressed overnight, I didn't form any habit overnight. Change has to happen, there is no magic pill, no prayer, no life coach, trainer or doctor that can erase the lifetime of self destructive habits that everyone carry on their back in one night. Start small, small habits that can impact your health for the better. Change is inward, it can't be taught, it can't be coached, which makes it 100% your choice. You decide, you no one else.

Advocare is an awesome place to start, and has been for me. Through supplementation I now get the proper nutrition into my body which gives me balance, and balance has improved my attitude, my marriage and my life. Going through "Commit 2 Fit "- 8 healthy life habits in 8 weeks is a great plan to use to start creating a healthy lifestyle. Am I where I want to be, do I look the way I want to look, the answer is most definitely no. BUT, I made a change, started down the right path towards living, and isn't that what it's all about? Quality of life, it all takes time, you owe it to yourself and those you love to get right... if you need help, or encouragement, I am here.

"There is never enough time to do everything, but there is always enough time to do the most important thing." ~ Brian Tracy~